Sunday, October 29, 2006

Thank you Noodle O' God

Spaghetti monster,
Brings me starchy goodness and
Pasta nirvana.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006


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Centennial, CO - A woman who stabbed her young granddaughter 62 times with a butcher knife after she received "spiritual messages from the geese flying overhead" has been determined to be criminally insane by the state mental hospital. Carol Pappas, 53, is accused of stabbing her 21-month-old granddaughter, Madison Pappas, on Oct. 29 at her son's house in Aurora. Pappas had told her son she was receiving the spiritual messages about eight months before authorities say she stabbed the little girl. She has pleaded not guilty by reason of insanity on the charges that she killed her granddaughter.


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COLUMBUS, Ohio (AP) - Jeffrey Lundgren, 56, is awaiting execution in Ohio. His sentence stems from a conviction for the fatal shooting of a family of five in 1989. The family, which included three children, was killed while they stood in a pit dug inside Lundgren’s barn in northeast Ohio. Lundgren formed a cult in 1987. He said passages in the Bible told him to kill the family. The family he killed had moved from Missouri in 1987 to follow Lundgren's teachings. Cult leader Jeffrey Lundgren says his diabetes and obesity would make execution by injection painful because he is overweight and diabetic.


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Anyone else see a pattern here?



This image provides incontrovertible proof of the existence of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

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The appearance of three FSM's in this photo is a matter of conjecture among experts. Recent scholarship suggests that the FSM recruited two Saucy Wenches to accompany him to the heavenly Beer Volcano for a Friday service. Another theory, equally plausible, posits that the photo has captured SpaghettiLarry, SpaghettiMoe, and SpaghettiCurly en route to the Heavenly Stripper Factory. Most experts agree that the actual truth is immaterial (and probably stupid).

This is a picture of the earth-based telescope that captured this image.

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Notice the uncanny resemblance to a 'dalek.'

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So Fellow Pirates and Wenches, sail forth and spread the word of the One True Creator of the Universe and All Within It - May His Noodly Goodness Nourish and Sustain Us All.


Hungry for more? Go to: The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster

Telescope images courtesy of NOAO/AURA/NSF.

Wednesday, October 18, 2006


Concerned about voter suppression? I am.

Check this site to verify your registration (and a lot of other nifty things!).

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Can't Afford a Gun?

New Argument Against Abortion/Birth Control

Use your newborn as a weapon!

From the New York Times:

Authorities say [Chytoria Graham] grabbed the infant by his feet and swung him, hitting her boyfriend and fracturing the baby's skull.

No word on the boyfriend's condition.

Read the Whole Story

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Senate Wins Fight To Lower Allowable Amperage Levels On Detainees' Testicles

September 29, 2006 | Issue 42•40

WASHINGTON, DC—Led by a bipartisan group of senators critical of White House policy on suspected terrorists, the Senate passed a bill Thursday that prohibits interrogators from exceeding 100 amps per testicle when questioning detainees. "Even in times of war, it is counterproductive and wrong to employ certain inhumane interrogation techniques, and using three-digit amperage levels on the testicles of captives constitutes torture," said Sen. John Warner (R-VA), who has also supported reducing the size of attack dogs and the height of nude pyramids. "Using amperages of 99 and lower, with approved surge protectors on the jumper-cable clamps, are the hallmarks of a civilized society." The legislation did not address amperage restrictions on suspected terrorists' labia.

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